I apologize. I’ve been AWOL. And, as my form of apology, I have this picture to offer.
Taken on a Colorado River trip, in June of 1997. For those of you know me now, without hair, it probably looks like some wings have been affixed to my head.
My Gift to You
2 Mar 11 by Tim Martin | No Comments | 21 view(s)Categories: family | Tags: funny, tim
Mr. Peppy Businessman
31 Jan 11 by Tim Martin | No Comments | 102 view(s)Categories: family | Tags: funny, oakley, school, words
This morning, before I left for work, I said goodbye to Oakley. She responded with an upturned, “Okay!”. And so, of course, I mocked her, responding with equal pep. I mean, that is my job as her father, right?
We went our separate ways for the day; me to work, Oakley to school. Tonight, after the girls were in bed, I got to see two pretty funny things. First, Oakley’s steno, which includes a daily note from Oakley, written during school.
Oakley’s Haiku
29 Apr 10 by Tim Martin | 2 Comments | 79 view(s)Categories: family | Tags: funny, oakley, school, words
Oakley wrote a haiku at school (ok, 2 haikus). I’m guessing it was an assignment in her class, from her teacher, but who am I to know. She brought it home tonight.
Haiku #1
I love my mommy
My mommy is wonderful!!
I love my mommy
Target. Mah-tah.
28 Nov 09 by Tim Martin | No Comments | 12 view(s)Categories: family | Tags: aspen, funny, words
Aspen and Jenn were hanging out this week, and Aspen happened to notice a bag with a logo much like the one above.
Aspen: Now I get it!
Jenn: What?
Aspen: Now I get why a Target bag has that shape on it. It’s a target.
Jenn: Yes.
Aspen: That must be their mah-tah!
Jenn: What?!
Aspen: Their mah-tah.
Jenn: Do you mean their “motto”?
Aspen: Yes. Sorry.
Jenn: Yeah, well, it’s OK. That’s their logo…
(Note: Aspen finds stuff like this funny, too! We still laugh about the way she first pronounced “dev-ah-stuh-ted”…)
Lays Potato Chips and Archaeology
8 Nov 09 by Tim Martin | No Comments | 91 view(s)Categories: family | Tags: aspen, funny, lindy, oakley, words
As new homes in Tennessee go, ours is in a pretty old spot. The very first settlement in Williamson County was, literally, across the street from us, and dates back to at least 1800. We’re talking really old. In fact, our local plant expert, Mike Berkley, tells us that his read on things is that our “orchard” has been cultivated for an incredibly long time.
Dancing
22 Mar 09 by Tim Martin | No Comments | 56 view(s)Categories: Uncategorized | Tags: aspen, funny, lindy, oakley
Always a good source of humor, we had a funny moment this morning…
Aspen: I’ve been really into Irish dancing lately. Someone in my class is an Irish dancer, you know.
Oakley: Aspen, can you do a Mexican dance.
At this point, I looked over and the dance looked remotely Mexican, a surprise.
Lindy: Look at this! This is a sexican dance!
Uh-oh.
7 Feb 09 by Tim Martin | No Comments | 43 view(s)
Categories: Uncategorized | Tags: aspen, funny, lindy, words
Aspen’s helping Lindy with making her Valentine’s cards right now.
Aspen: Do you want to use the “Be Mine” heart or the “Be My Valentine” heart?
Lindy: This is XXXXX’s [name redacted].
Aspen: So you want it to say, “Be Mine”?
Lindy: No. I want it to say, “Stop pushing and hitting and being mean.”
Sorry, Lindy, we didn’t get that card this year.
This Season’s Accessories
17 Jan 09 by Tim Martin | No Comments | 29 view(s)Categories: Uncategorized | Tags: funny, lindy
Pictured here:
- Red cowboy hat with star
- Purple/pink sunglasses
- Purple cape with clothespin
- Pink beaded necklace
- Lavender beaded necklace
- Purple beaded necklace with medalion
- Palio scarf from Siena, Italy
- One inch think cowgirl dress/bath mat
- Pink stiff tutu
- Lavender velvet asymmetrical skirt
- Size 7 pink flip flops
Not seen (hidden under other layers):
- Pink mesh skirt
- Purple mesh skirt
Lindy’s quote:
“I’m waving to everyone.”
She claims this really happened
23 Dec 08 by Tim Martin | 1 Comment | 56 view(s)Categories: Uncategorized | Tags: funny, jenn, tim
Since my wife is unlikely to blog, I figured I would share this with you. She claims that it really happened, but I’ll let you be the judge.
Last night, I went to bed before Jenn. Mind you, I didn’t go early or anything… it was after midnight (due to the wrapping). Knowing my wife, it was probably 2am by the time she arrived. I was, apparently, asleep already.
Jenn: kneels down to pray as she does before getting in bed
Tim: Are you looking for the bovine creatures?
Jenn: ignores me… thinking I’m just mumbling in my sleep
Tim: Are you looking for the nekkid cows?
Jenn: What? No, I’m praying. [laughs]
Tim: [annoyed] Stop laughing. I used the right word. Bovine means cows.
Mind you, I’m not the only one who says silly stuff when sleepy. Back in, oh, 1996, Jenn and I had this exchange as she napped one day:
Jenn: [deep in her nap] You missed your pick!
Tim: What?
Jenn: You missed your pick!
Tim: What are we picking?
Jenn: We’re pickin’ pigs.
Well, obviously.
And lastly, can I ask you this? Should I be pleased about Jenn’s current judgment or concerned about her initial judgment when I hear last night that she has to return something she’s purchased for me because it’s for a woman?
"How do the lambs know what time it is?"
9 Dec 08 by Tim Martin | 2 Comments | 36 view(s)Categories: Uncategorized | Tags: funny, lindy, words
Lindy asked me that this weekend. We were sitting at lunch, eating gyros, with the Hickmans and the Watsons. I looked around the restaurant, trying to figure out what the heck she was talking about.
Do you know?
Would it help you if I said, “Pa rum pum pum pum”?
I think Tim Hickman was the one to figure it out. We spent much of the meal from that point forward trying to figure out how an ox or a lamb might keep time… Foot tapping? Does a cloven hoof make it difficult to snap?