Jenn... See, I haven't gotten Jenn to blog herself yet, so you get stories that I hear.
Jenn was making dinner with Aspen tonight, and Aspen's getting old enough where she can actually put stuff in a hot pot. Jenn reminded her not to touch the pot, because it was very hot and she could be burned. Aspen's response:
I won't, Mommy. I'm not like you.
Later, Jenn was playing with Lindy. Lindy decided to scan her.
Jenn: Lindy, how much do I cost? Lindy: Two dollars.
Lindy then scanned herself.
Jenn: Lindy, how much do you cost? Lindy: Too much.
Aspen's performance of "Go Fish!" went wonderfully last night. She nailed every line, and she did so with feeling. While I'm considering posting the full 35 minutes, I think we'll start with just this. It's the third scene, and the one that features most of Aspen's lines. If you can't find her, look for the Needlefish (with the tall silver hat).
OK, we really enjoy reading Into the Woods around here (and singing it, occasionally). One funny line from it goes like this...
"Because the Baker had lost his mother and father in a baking accident -- or so he believed..."
Well, ours was nothing that severe. Lindy and I often bake some cookies together on Wednesday nights while the others are at church.
Tim: Lindy, I need you to add three scoops [tablespoons] of salt. Lindy: [scooping] One. Oven: Beep, beep. [Jenn had left some bread in the oven. I know, it is a lot of baking.]
[I closed the salt cellar and turned around to get the bread out. As I was removing it from the pans, I heard the salt cellar close.]
Tim: Lindy, did you put in more salt. Lindy: Yes. Tim: How much did you put in? Lindy: Two. Tim: Two more scoops? [Which would have been the right amount.] Lindy: [blank stare] Tim: Lindy, tell me exactly how much more you put in. Lindy: Four inches. Tim: Thanks, Lindy. I'm gonna do the baking soda myself, OK?
So I took Aspen and Oakley to the Predators' playoff game tonight. Rather than share stories about hockey (the Preds are far more resilient than I give them credit for), I will share a funny moment from early in the game.
Aspen: Daddy? Why are the cheerleaders' shirts so short? [They wear crop tops, where the the entire midruff is bared.] Tim: Well, they think they look cute. Aspen: Well, do they? Look cute? Tim: Well, Aspen, what do you think? Aspen: I don't know.
A big piece of the excitement this week is the build up to Aspen's performance in Go Fish! this Thursday. Aspen was lucky enough to be selected for a part recently, and has been rehearsing each morning last week (as she will this week).
Here you can see the result of my handiwork on her costume... (That's right, I was bordering on "crafty".)
So I was waiting at a jewelry store with the girls today (as I do every weekend, right?)
A woman walked in with a serpent bracelet. It wrapped around her arm two times and had a head that pointed toward her hand. She mentioned to the woman in the store that a red bead had fallen off, and she was seeking a replacement.
Oakley: What's she doing? What does she need? Tim: Well, she doesn't want to have a one-eyed snake.
It is at this moment that I realize the euphemistic nature of my prior statement. Whether the woman did or did not, she went on to say...
Woman: I wouldn't want anyone to get the wrong idea. [Moments later]
Oakley: Daddy, what's a "one-eyed snake"? Tim: Well, Oakley, it's a snake with one eye.
Somehow, I suspect I am not the only one relating this story tonight...
That's right, folks. I finally took the camera out and took a decent picture of one of my children. This time of year feels pretty busy, what with soccer and rained out soccer. But tonight, Lindy and I got the chance to chill, so we did it. She even smiled for one or two pictures. You can check out the rest of the set here.
I played tennis with Hickman tonight. I am, admittedly, a mediocre tennis player. During the second game, I went to hit an overhead. I missed long, but I did hit it hard. It sailed past Tim. And then I saw him, the nice, older, Asian man from the adjacent court. He was walking behind Tim to get a ball. I screamed, "Look out!" He, uh, didn't. The ball pelted him in the shoulder. Tim and I both apologized. Apparently he didn't speak English because he just pointed at his shoulder. It was really very funny, but Tim and I felt we couldn't laugh. We both tried to stifle it, we really did. This resulted in giggling. Later, we both admitted that we had cried.
Jenn has my car today because I took hers in for 30,000 mile service. That means that the kids get to experience some different music than normal. As I'm sure you all know, I'm pretty hardcore. At this moment, I'm kicking some, well, ok, I have showtunes in my CD player right now. Jenn and I went to see Rent last Friday at TPAC, and so I had been listening to it lately.
So, this is the scene in the car on the way to day school today:
Angel (Rent): New York City. Collins (Rent): Uh huh. Angel (Rent): Center of the universe. Collins (Rent): Sing it, girl. Angel (Rent): Times are shitty, but I'm pretty sure they can't get worse. Lindy: puzzled expression I don't know what sitty means. Jenn: pushes skip button quickly Oakley: No, Lindy, it's shitty. Jenn: Sometimes people use words we just shouldn't use.
We have no indication of whether Oakley knows what shitty means...
Well, we're in the spring soccer season, which means we're missing games pretty regularly. Rain seems to be killing us, especially the U7's, Aspen's team. We finally got our first games in on Saturday, and both were a lot of fun.
Aspen was her typical responsible self, and the final score of her game was 1-1. She was a big part of that. Frankly, her team has come a long way over the winter (absence makes them better, apparently). There was some passing, and the team was quite effective as a whole.
Oakley had a solid game as well. For her, that meant poking home three goals during the game and colliding with Zoe and a bunch of other girls. If we renamed the team now, we'd be called the Wrecking Balls.
Today's practice was pretty funny. Among our spectators for practice were a couple of Tennessee Titans (one former, one current). One of them has a daughter on the team. The other you have probably heard of... he's super freaky. Well, we were having a good time, and then the rains came. We've made a point with the girls that we'll play through anything. That meant that we just kept on playing. Well, let's say that certain members of our crowd made it to the car pretty quickly. Twenty minutes later, the girls were still playing duck duck goose, wet bottoms and all.
