This is actually what Oakley wrote in her letter home from camp today.
Hello, my dear family. How do you fare? Hopefully you are doing well, enjoying a calm and carefree summer day with a loyal and loving dane named Zeus lying faithfully at your side. Although the outside environment may seem to be a flaming inferno, hopefully you have the blessing of ice or air conditioning or a dip in a more temperate pool to cool you down. All in all, I just hope that you are having a simply dandy time. I hope that you embody the extremely excellent epitome of enjoyment and ease.
Whoa, okay, those sentences were an interesting strand of strange idealism – perhaps a vision of peace that I desire in contrast to the situation currently surrounding me. An explanation shall follow:
Earlier today, July 16th, my friends and I began to hear rumors of some cabins infested with lice. Of course we became disgusted, paranoid, and relieved that we were out of the reach of the dreadful parasite. I got Emiko and one of my counselors to check me and was glad when they didn’t see any creatures nestling within my plentiful mane of brown strands.
However, another girl in my cabin discovered the bugs in her own blonde tresses, much to my HORROR! She went to the nurse for treatment, but because so many people had contracted the parasite all treatment stores were exhausted. Having no other option, she and her lice-ridden head trundled right back into the midst of camp. Upon returning to my cabin following the close of lunch, I received a dreadful message – take everything off your bed to be washed, don’t touch your head to anything, put on your swim cap – and, oh, you probably have lice because yesterday you sat on the bus for 2 hours with the girl who actually has it. Great!
After burning up on our naked beds for a while, we made it to the nurse. Good news – I HAVE NO LICE!!! Guys, thx for reading my dramatic and pessimistic narrative. Sorry 4 the complaining. ❤️ Oak