“I was robbed!”

This is absolutely a phrase I utter with some regularity. When my frisbee bounces off the cage at disc golf, I was clearly robbed. Well, on this occasion, the phrase is literal!

I got a call from Jenn (uncommon) at the office on Wednesday. She was clearly a bit upset, and told me that she thought we’d been robbed. Yes, she was standing in the house. Yes, I told her to leave right away. Yes, I called 911. Yes, I went straight home. Yes, Jenn later apologized for calling me at work and being panicked. (How funny is my wife? Some wives call several times a day with mundane questions or petty issues… My wife apologized for calling when we were robbed!)

This is what I saw right after I got home…


A police lineup if I’ve ever seen one

So, yes, we were robbed. We’re really handling it remarkably well, honestly. As Jenn was waiting with the girls in the car (the girls were naked, having just gotten back from the pool and disrobed prior to discovering the intrusion), they discussed what might be gone in the house. Jenn asked them what might be most important to them:

  • Tim: The network attached storage with the originals of all our pictures
  • Jenn: A necklace from Nanny
  • Aspen: A bracelet from Nana
  • Oakley: “Uh, I don’t know.”
  • Lindy: Her “candle”.

Well, as we went through the house, we found everything but Aspen’s bracelet right away. The robber had gone through Aspen’s jewelry box, and the content were strewn gently on her bed. Unfortunately, there was no bracelet to be found. Aspen came downstairs and cried, cried, cried. We comforted her and told her it would be made right. Very sad.

10 minutes later Oakley found her bracelet. (Really, was the guy going to take a beaded bracelet when he had failed to grab my Macbook Pro and 80 dollars cash?)

Lastly, a bit of advice. If you have any jewelry you’d really like to protect… Simply leave it with the feminine products! That’s right, our friendly robber went nowhere near the ring Jenn happened to have left on that shelf of the closet!

So, we’re doing fine. No need to worry. Metlife seems to be taking good care of us… When the worst part of a getting robbed is the hassle and the fact that the guy left the freezer partially ajar, you know you’re doing pretty well. (Metlife is lucky that no one won the Powerball on Wednesday. Had this unexpected event caused me to miss buying the ticket that wins it for me, I would have had to include it on the incident report.)

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